Several years ago when a close friend asked me to help "a recent college graduate girl from Mumbai" get settled in Bangalore, my mind conjured up the image of a fair girl, fashionably thin, with skinny jeans, a fancy top and the ubiquitous mascara. When I received an email from her enquiring about the dress code at Lucent I was already biased towards her being rather disagreeable; who bothered about office dress codes in the 90's!
But over the telephone she sounded rather sweet.
I can never forget the day we finally met. She walking tall in her salwar suit, me slouching at my desk in an oversized Tee and baggy jeans. It was the day Dr.Rajkumar was kidnapped. Poor girl, I don't know what she must've been thinking when she saw me dressed thus!
From that improbable first meeting emerged the best friendship of my life.
We appeared to be exact opposites of each other (shouldn't I be using the present tense?). She, the fashionista, with an impeccable sense of style, an uncanny worldly aptitude and a fighter. Me, the laid back, wear-what-you-can-grab, peace-be-with you person. I don't know if she felt it, but for me it was a "like at first sight". She moved in with me, for the time, in a make do arrangement until she got her own place. And then our lives almost separated... almost.
Once in a while she'd call (as my friends will vouch I *was* never good at staying in touch, key word being WAS :), and we'd have a stilted conversation. We'd agree to go out someday, shopping, movies and do all the gal-friend stuff she so enjoyed but that tested my patience (at that time! I've grown up now!!). At times I did muster the courage to go shopping with her, and it was like ... getting takeout from KFC; after long periods I'd forget how absurd the experience was and give in to a spontaneous urge. The lady's shopping will was (*was*; like me, she's grown and improved too :) insatiable. She could shop all day, visit malls at all four corners of the city, and end up with nothing or barely a single top. "That's how it's done!", she'd exclaim impatiently.
And then there were times when she'd be ill. A call from her at an unearthly hour meant she wasn't feeling too good; she needed to talk to someone, feel the security of knowing someone was there that cared. Then she'd sound like a little girl. Those were the times I never minded driving up to her apartment, in some god forsaken part of the city. I am glad I was there when she needed support; more importantly I'm glad she knows she can count on me when she needs help.
Oh, wait, I forgot to mention another trait that we NEVER shared; a sense of food. I'm not a foodie, junk food is my staple, culinary skills stop at whipping up a sloppy sandwich. She on the other hand is everything that a food lover would love to have, a magician in the kitchen! For god's sake, the lady even salvaged my disastrous attempts at preparing rice when my mother-in-law was visiting!
And then there was the time when we shared the apartment for almost a year together. If we weren't close enough, the time together really cemented our relationship. Her parents visited us and it was among the best times I've had in Bangalore. Animated discussions with her Baba, admonitions from her mom at my food habits, cooking together, watching TV, just being together... a wonderful wonderful time. And then those long drives, she with her Kiney, me with my RX, joyrides on the newly constructed Hebbal flyover, and feeling and being part of a shared enjoyment.
Everything I know about being a "lady" I learnt from her, and she darned well knows it! Oh, the umpteen times she's attempted to teach me to apply lipstick correctly. Her collection of cosmetics overwhelmed me, until one day I shocked her with my own bottle of eye liner :-D
I could go on and on about all she's done for me, everything that she'd advised me on, suggested to me and also bullied me into doing because she knew something was best for me at that time.
Today, on her birthday, this is my sincere message to her:
You enriched my life and I cannot even begin to describe how; I suspect you know it already. I didn't realize how you've always been there for me, even when I was deluding myself about being self sufficient. And when I did ask for help, you never once refused. You've always been genuinely happy for happy for me, and when I was in the doldrums you've been the one relentlessly and patiently bringing me back from the edges of desperation. You've motivated me, and encouraged me. You've advised me, cautioned me and at times berated me for my foolhardiness. You brought cheer and fun into my life. You're the one who taught me how to party, how to be-out-there and you're the one who persuaded me get my first pair of high heels!
For all this and much more, I wish I could say how thankful I am. I wish I could give you even one small part of what you've given me.
I wish you all the happiness that you so truly deserve. I wish I could share with you all the cheer and goodness I have. I wish you get everything that you dream of, and more. Be cautioned, "everything" includes all good things, success, wonderful happiness, and a loving sharing caring soul mate. I wish for you all the good that I know you wish for me, and if possible, some more too :)
Happy Birthday Dear Girl Friend !!
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